WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD BITCH

(Ghostwriter tears at this moment of starting on this blog of the memory in visions of the thoughts of it,so yes the tittle fits it very well)
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marrying your high school sweetheart is a reality check when her heart turn sour,as kids life is carefree and anything can be fixed with a chocolate cake,and that includes a broken heart. my mother kept her eyes on me and my wife did the same from a distant,my mom said I was gullible and my wife said I was naive to the real world,being a product of my circumstances.as my wife and I grew older her list of demands also grew. I was juggling a young marriage, a show business career, school and soon forced by wife to find a "real job in the real world".my wife friends were only happy for her if they were getting broke off! LIKE getting in clubs free or meeting famous comedians up close and personal,yeah her girlfriends loved those " private meet and greet"..you know the backstage hook up, I also will mention liquor taste better when it's FREE!, other than that, they would put words in my wife head, my mom was happy with my wife and I never thought of any other. my wife friend told her that they were hiring where she work,so my wife brought me a job application from her friend job,my wife help me write out the application(this is my first time seeing a application,my first pay check was a show business pay check, no application for that!) so my wife give my finished application to her friend, oncieana was her name or something like that,so time pass and I walk in the house and oncieana and wifey are sitting on the couch looking at a suit for a man, so I am thinking it's for a show I got a call on the phone for but it was for a real interview for a real job,I never seen two young women so happy to see a young man get a "REAL JOB"! I explain to my wife And all her friends my production company is doing okay, we don't need a "REAL JOB" but my wife kept saying,(these exact words "I know sweetheart but this real job is..plan B")...WTF! right?...so on the way over to "REAL JOB INTERVIEW" I was thinking about to not do well in the job interview, so I walk in to the fast food restaurant and WIFEY is sitting in the managers office with oncienna or what ever her fucking name was,both has a cheese cake smile on their faces! when the restaurant manager walked out of the office,she asked me when can I start, I was like, START WHAT? my wife cleared her throat loud enough to get my
attention,when I looked over at my wife she was silently moving her lips,and her silent lips words "please don't fuck this up,please" so I look away from my wife,the restaurant manager repeated her question to me, and my wife answer the question with "NOW!!"..this day was END of into the beginning of.
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 ( VANN DUKE AND SAMMY LAST JOKE)      

'YOU TAKE THE HIGH ROAD, I TAKE THE LOW ROAD'

VANN DUKE: GOD CALLED........
SAMMY: WHAT DID GOD SAY.......
VANN DUKE: GOD SAID TO ME,EDGAR BERGEN AND CHARLIE MCCARTHY ARE GREETERS AT THE GATES OF HEAVEN AND GOD ASKED ME TO WRITE JOKES FOR EDGAR BERGEN AND CHARLIE MCCARTHY.............
SAMMY: YOU TAKE THE HIGH ROAD, I TAKE THE LOW ROAD.......
VANN DUKE: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? WE'RE A TEAM! YOU ARE GOING WITH ME..SAMMY: NO I AIN'T!......
VANN DUKE:WHY NOT?......
SAMMY:THE DEVIL CALLED.....
VANN DUKE: WHAT DID THE DEVIL SAY?.....
SAMMY:THE DEVIL SAID HE REALLY, REALLY NEED ME IN HELL......
VANN DUKE:WHAT DO THE DEVIL IN HELL NEED YOU FOR?........
SAMMY: FIRE WOOD......

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"GLASS HALF FULL HALF EMPTY"

being married I take on a lot of responsibility not wanting my wife to end up in harm's way, I worked in the real world very much at real jobs.one job I remember as a very special moment as a young man was domino's pizza, my mother loved when I worked at domino's pizza because I would deliver free hot pizza to her in my domino's pizza uniform..in the real world I continue my show business career by networking and building my promotional company department,working at domino's pizza get me many show bookings for parties,birthday parties, and even weddings.. while delivering pizza I would include my business card with the pizza to the customer or if the pizza customer had kids,I would let the parents know about my production company  entertainment company for their children next birthday party...I also want to mention back in the day domino's pizza delivery drivers get paid tips! and gas money,I get paid for each pizza,let's say one dollar a delivery so rudy would load my car up with pizza delivery! hey I remember the domino's pizza manager name RUDY! shout out to my domino's pizza manager back in the day name RUDY, true hustlers! yeah rudy,a real one...hustler$.......

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(GLASS HALF EMPTY HALF FULL my lil homie Rome and many Juliets)

graduation from high school toss many teenagers into the real world automatically, smart teenagers had made plans for the first day after graduation,but a teenager like my lil homie Rome,being a teenager was all he knew,such things like school, girls, home, money moves...

one day Rome was having a very serious conversation with me,well not quite with me but at me, I was thinking to myself what's wrong with Rome he's really on one,basically Rome has graduated from high school and now his parents has hit the magic number "18" yes Rome is age eighteen now and his parents no longer has a responsibility for him and like the tittle of this blog says "welcome to the real world bitch" he don't know what he's going to do with his life,he thought he would never see the day of the real world of being on his own with out mom and dad...time passed when Rome started hanging out with a baller name Ronnie, Ronnie was a playa,with nice cars and clothes and a college student living with his parents...Rome looked up to Ronnie and found a role model in him, so I am washing my car and Rome stop by wearing fila down from head to toe,he pick up a towel to help me wash my car,while telling me about thinking about his new money moves with big baller Ronnie, he mention pimping crackheads and selling drugs..I asked Rome did he get it started  with Ronnie yet, he said no he was just thinking about it, I told him to stop by tomorrow and to dress to impress...tomorrow came and Rome was nicely dress,he asked me where we were going, I answered by saying we are going to take a quick drive to the real world, back in the day most neighborhoods had a unemployment office...

when me and my lil homie Rome arrived at the unemployment office building parking lot,I made a deal with my lil homie Rome that this building we are about to enter is your option one, and option two would be starting that money move with big baller Ronnie, my lil homie Rome was over delighted that he had options..back in the day the unemployment office had a wall full of jobs waiting to be filled with hiring people.. on the wall,you pick the job you want on the wall,take it to the front desk to give to the person sitting at the desk with your paper work,the person at the desk would interview you,make a phone call to the person that is doing the hiring,then give you the address to the hiring locations..Rome wanted this one particular job and it was a bicycle store,he was sent to the bicycle store and I was sent to a warehouse for putting labels on boxes,I get the packing labels jobs but my lil homie Rome was very sad about not getting the job for working in bicycle store..A few days later me and my lil homie Rome argued in his parents driveway..

I must mention my lil homie Rome looked like the lead singer of the band name "ready for the world" and was a very sharp dresser, with a deep voice and did not have a worry in the world,he break up with a girl and five minutes later another one would be next to him,I tell you turning age eighteen is a motherfucker...the argument in his parents driveway almost brought me and my lil homie Rome to our first fist fight together....what was the argument about, well...my lil homie Rome was becoming a man, reality was a big slap in the face for my lil homie Rome, he was screaming and raging at me saying that I got everything and he don't have shit, and I try to insure my lil homie Rome that he's going to be alright but he became more combative and for sure I am not going to hit or fight my lil homie Rome, so I get in my car and leave....time passed when my lil homie Rome visit me at my house,still talking about not knowing what he's going to do,Sammy was sitting on his ventriloquist dummy trunk so my lil homie Rome get a wonderful idea in his mind, my lil homie Rome take his 45 automatic from his pocket and says he can be security for my production company,I take my 380 from under my pillow and say I am a ventriloquist not a rapper..my lil homie Rome apologize to me about the driveway argument, I gave Rome another option, I was working at domino's pizza as a pizza delivery driver, I would take my lil homie Rome to work with me,I said Rome the tips belong to you and the pizza delivery money belong to Sammy and of course the pay check belong to me... my lil homie Rome enjoyed going on pizza delivery with me, I would drive and he did the delivery to the customer door..Rome made a lot of tip money and he also said (these exact words) "I get more pussy with you than I did with Ronnie" it's because when you have a guy that look like the lead singer of the band ready for the world knocking on your front door the ladies would just go crazy!!..I knew the ladies would go crazy for my lil homie Rome because well,let me be careful  what I say because my high school sweetheart might be reading this blog so let's just say it this way... 

"I look so innocent don't I?".....  :-)

my lil homie Rome made so much money with his pizza tips he bought a double up with out Ronnie...what is a double up? it's a drug deal..he said he wanted to partner with me,I told my lil homie Rome no but he said he never sold drugs and was nervous about it,I told my lil homie Rome I would kick it with him,but wow the things I have seen while kicking it with my lil homie Rome,my lil homie Rome begin to change, the streets made him brutal.. my lil homie Rome came up fast slanging drugs,so fast where I am sitting on the couch in the living room of Mr. Sunday Simms..wow! my lil black ass was about to shit my pants,lil homies rome is whispering to me if this motherfucka tell a joke you laugh your ass off even if it's not funny and if he fart we both say it smell like fried chicken..mr. Sunday Simms wife come out the kitchen and hand both us a glass of wine and leave, sunday Simms comes out of one of his bedrooms and sit across from me and my lil homie Rome, he's talking about sports on television then his wife come out and sit on his lap,while he continue talking about sports,my lil homie Rome seem as if he was interested in Sunday Simms conversation but I became relaxed because me being in show business I have seen this business tactics before, so Mr. Sunday Simms wife get off Mr. Sunday Simms lap and show my lil homie Rome a note,my lil homie Rome shake his head yes, the wife eat the note,my lil homie Rome go in the kitchen to put money inside a large cookie jar,come back sit next to me,the wife go into the kitchen come back out with the cookie jar asked Sunday Simms would he like a fresh chocolate chip cookie,sunday Simms looks in side the cookie jar with both hands,the wife walks over to my lil homie Rome and show him another paper written note,Rome shake his head yes,the wife eat the note,me and my lil homie Rome leave out Sunday Simms front door to a shoe box near the front gate,my lil homie Rome pick up the shoe box, my lil homie Rome open the shoe box,inside the shoe box are bags and bags and bags of crack cocaine,my lil homie Rome said "woo wee that is that gold color shit!!" he told me don't drive nigga break!! my lil homie Rome ran home one way and I ran home in the opposite direction.....

Believe it or not my lil homie Rome became a successful street corner drug dealer, not to say graduating from high school was a waste of time, my boy Rome put his high school education and street smarts to work for himself..my lil homie Rome became ghetto famous over night, what my lil homie Rome did not realize is that being a drug dealer is a crime...my lil homie Rome bought his first car from a body shop if you don't know what buying a car from a body shop means go study it and find out for yourself it will kick you some street knowledge.

oh my god! my lil homie Rome first car he bought from the body shop was a beautiful Oldsmobile cutlass supreme with a candy paint of chocolate brown, rolling on twelves, deep dish silver Daytons with the blue night light stims, two 15 inch woofers in the backseat,with a front, back, side to side and lay down switch, in side the car was white fur interior and white leather seats, with a custom tee top,the Windows had that nice illegal tint...

riding in side was like floating in the air because the drive was so smooth and quiet...me and my lil homie Rome set up a block a cross the tracks,I had to remind my lil homie Rome many times I am just kicking it with him, the cutlass was called the chocolate factory and the word spread fast, when the cutlass is laying down keep walking and no drive up, walk up service only,if you drive up you are getting layed down no question asked,hanging out with my lil homie Rome made me grab up a 32 snub nose all black with hollow points,I talk to my lil homie Rome a lot about flipping all that cash he was making but he said I sound like his pops and Rome and his dad was close so he had good people in his ear but he wasn't hearing them...

the chocolate factory was really popular on the block,so popular names like Tommy benzo not that one the high roller one, also almillio kick it a few times briefly, almillio was a famous known street drug dealer back in the day, he drove a white Chevy Monte Carlo with gold Daytons, we grow up in the same hood together but like my lil homie Rome what do a teenager in the hoods and ghettos do after high school, almillio was Tommy benzo nephew, almillio death was in the news, he was set up by a girl that pretended to love him and had almillio ambushed at a traffic light, his car is seen on the news sprayed with gun bullets sitting at the traffic light...John john fat rat was another ghetto famous drug dealer that kick it on the block at the chocolate factory, John John was mostly known as fat rat, when his block was slow my lil homie Rome would let fat rat get some work in by taking turns on crackheads walking up, fat rat made his come up for the night then would go home but my lil homie Rome was greedy, five hundred dollars a night was not enough money so I start driving my own car until my lil homie Rome start bitching about me abandoning him so I started riding with him to the block in the chocolate factory until one night my lil homie Rome told me to go see what a monster truck a few feet away was stopping for,it was a big black man sweating looking down at me from a nice big beautiful monster truck, the successful African American man,said I heard about the chocolate factory,where is it, I think he's a cop, so I walk away as I am walking away, I hear the big strong black man cry out PLEASE BROTHER PLEASE I AM BEGGING YOU!! I turned around walk back to the big black successful strong man sitting in the nice beautiful monster truck, I look at his face,he's crying and shaking and sweating, I say to myself he's going through withdrawal, I said to the big strong black man sitting in the beautiful monster truck the chocolate factory is no longer here, he drove away fast,I was a teenager and even till this day I see that man's face.I walk back to Rome,he asked what was up with that guy but I did not tell Rome the truth, but I did feel like I had to vomit,if I told Rome the truth he would have looked at it as money lost, one of the final nights of kicking with my lil homie Rome at the chocolate factory on the block was one night a pretty African American woman didn't have any money, she approaches me and my lil homie Rome with a sympathy story,about getting crack cocaine on credit, like a loan,my lil homie Rome was cussing her out, she moved away from my lil homie Rome and offer me a very expensive looking leather jacket she was wearing, I looked at her finger and she was wearing a fucking wedding ring,I am thinking it's one o'clock in the morning this is someone wife and mother, then what really pissed me off, is when she started taking off a gold necklace from around her neck,saying this is a gift my grandmother give to me, I gave Rome the look and my lil homie Rome lifted up his shirt to show the girl we are the real one,the girl walk away quietly...I hated when fat rat visit the chocolate factory on the block because him and my lil homie Rome would be laughing at the stories he would be telling about his crackhead customers....

one story he told many times that I never for get is one night fat rat drove up with one of his pit bulls,that night my lil homie Rome let fat rat put in work on the block at the chocolate factory..

we are talking about all his pitbull dogs, he raise and breed pit bulls and sell the puppies..he told the story a few times but the first time was just disgusting..fat rat went into deep details but I will not on this blog, fat rat tells the story of a crackhead giving one of his pit bulls oral sex while other small time drug dealers watched,he said the crackhead gave one of his dogs a blow job for a dove rock,crack cocaine..wait for it...

let me gather my thoughts for this writing..o.k, alright..oh boy...this is not easy to write....

fat rat made a small piece of bar soap look like twenty dollars worth of rock crack cocaine, called a dove,the soap used is name dove soap,fat rat bet money to all his small time drug dealer friends that he can get a crackhead to give one of his pitbulls a blow job for a crack cocaine rock,all the small time drug dealers put their money down for the bet and watched closely and yes a crackhead did give a blow job to one of fat rat pit bull dogs for a small piece of bar soap....I am in the comedy business but this story is not funny to me but my lil homie Rome loved hearing it every time,we all have a different sense of humor, Wright?...I had to water this blog down a little bit, because it is written in the raw and it is true,I know the vann duke and Sammy autobiography is supposed to be more deep than the vann duke and Sammy myspace bio

but the images in my mind are terrifying...bring this blog to an end...like I mentioned before theses are my final nights of kicking it with my lil homie Rome on the block at the chocolate factory.........Rome told me he really appreciate me kicking it with him on the block at the chocolate factory, he told me he's thankful for me and all is good,I suddenly empty my pockets putting everything on the hood of the chocolate factory..

there was another drug dealer kicking it with us that night but he was a small time one,one of my lil homie Rome admirers..you know the Ring kissers, the oh Rome your my god,that admirer..

Rome said is this a buy out! I take out my 32 snub nose holding it down at my side (saying in my soul are we witches) hoping I don't have to raise it up to point at my lil homie Rome, is this a buy out! Rome yells to me, Rome is confused about my action.. I am walking backwards facing Rome, I said "no it's a gift" and ran all the way home.....

I didn't mention the fat rat crack head boxing

ring he had in his garage, fat rat had crackheads fight and box for drugs while drug dealers bet money on the fight, fat rat was also a dog fighter, he would have his pit bulls fight other dogs for money, I have witnessed some of those dog fights myself and wow fat rat pit bulls were

viscous....

(WHO WAS SUNDAY SIMMS)

Sunday Simms was a big time drug dealer back in the day when I was a child..Sunday Simms drugs of cocaine came from the port. he was a drug supplier and drug transporter or trafficking.

(WHO WAS TOMMY BENZO)

Tommy benzo was a high roller back in the day very famous in the hoods and ghettos. 

Tommy benzo was a drug dealer of crack cocaine and a manufacturer of other illegal drugs,he also was a weapon supplier, if you needed a untraceable "guns" you go see Tommy benzo,Tommy benzo trademark was owning over six Merced benz all custom made,if you walk pass his house,his front yard were full of Merced benz, low riders Merced benz, classic Merced benz, custom made Merced benz.some people say Tommy benzo had close to $80mill parked in his front yard....

(READING ROME)

you may ask the ghostwriter about my lil homie Rome fast success with pizza delivery tips..I myself want to give you a more insight because I created a monster...before I take my lil homie rome to work with me when I was working at domino's pizza,I would network and promote my production company to pizza customers,like business cards, fliers,etc..when I provided my lil homie rome with another option by me driving and him taking the pizza to the customers door for the tip money, I stop networking and promoting my production company...my lil homie Rome didn't only get tip money but as a eighteen year old he had forty year old women ordering pizza just to see him,bringing me to another argument with my lil homie Rome..

they were called sugar mamas back in the day..

my lil homie Rome had, I think three sugar mamas from the pizza gig but this special one sugar mama would let Rome drive her car and one day she needed a new set of tires, my lil homie Rome follow me to the tire shop,he drive the sugar mama car, I drive my car,the sugar mama gave my lil homie rome four hundred dollars for a set of tires.....

I ask the tire salesman about deals,the salesman put four brand new tires on the sugar mama car for one hundred dollars,I told my lil homie Rome,now he got three hundred dollars for himself and the sugar mama got brand new tires on her car..a few days later Rome arguing with me at my house about his sugar mama being upset about the new tires,I asked my lil homie Rome what's wrong with the new tires, he said his sugar mama said the new tires are retread tires,I remember that argument clearly..two teenage boys arguing about a sugar mama being upset about something, what the fuck!!! your sugar mama is mad about something! you're eighteen years old,she's forty years old! dude you're having sex with a grandma!!! ..this is before my lil homie Rome was a drug dealer..I told my lil homie Rome that he was pussy whipped and he better get his shit together...so yes my lil homie Rome had a few sugar mamas taking care of him on the pizza tip gig.....and no I didn't know those tires were retread tires,I was looking for low prices and my lil homie Rome sugar mama said he can keep the money left over from the new tires but bring the receipt..what the hell!,why didn't the sugar mama ask her husband to shop for new tires for her,Wright?..teenagers roll on momo and fuda and vogues tires,I am eighteen years old I never heard of retread tires, but I did hear the tire salesman say four brand new tires for a hundred dollars..so stop it grandma,we are 18!!........

I just want to give the reader a wider view on my lil homie Rome fast success with pizza tips..one more thing I want to say, my lil homie Rome had "a drive to succeed" ,he went to work with me six days a week,ringing door bells and knocking on doors, he treated that opportunity I gave him like a real job..rain,sunny or snow my lil homie Rome was on the hustle making that money move, and when my lil homie Rome and I was sitting in front of Mr. Sunday Simms,deep down inside I was so proud of my lil homie Rome, wow! Mr.Sunday Simms in the flesh..

yeah my lil homie Rome made it to success in the hoods and ghettos and he did it with out a hand out....if you read the complete vann duke and Sammy autobiography, you will learn the future of my lil homie Rome.

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(MILK AND PEANUT BUTTER SANDWICHES)

I used to talk to my mother about many things,I really didn't understand human beings,I really did want to understand people,but I do understand why God is invisible when it comes to dealing with human beings on planet earth...as a young boy I would bitch and cry to my mom about girls, I would say to my mother, I treat them with love and kindness,I am nice and gentle to them and they attack me in return with hate,why mother, why?, my mother would always say because you're "gullible"...as a young man I said to my big brother, brother brother why do people want to fight me,I reach out to help them and they bite my hand,why brother why?,my big brother said to me because "you're too good for your own good" I didn't understand what he meant by that..my girlfriends in my pass would say to me "all you care about is Sammy" even my mother threatened Sammy a few times,but I did notice males response to Sammy was different from females,I don't know why but me being a creative person I just let the creatures be what they are....people are born with gifts and talents, some people become rich and famous with those gifts and talents but just because the people that doesn't become rich or famous with their gifts or talents doesn't mean that they are not gifted or talented,we all can not be Michael Jackson,well let me restate that..you are you,and who knows one day you might be greater or less than Michael Jackson,but the point is, you still have your gifts and talents..I hope you are understanding what I am trying to say, o.k. I have a better example let's say you're born with the gift of cooking no matter where you are,even in a prison kitchen or in a high class restaurant people just love your food.

       

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