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SELF PROMOTER

I giggle like a lil school girl as I write on the subject of self promotion.there's many meaning of self promotion but let me give you my experience in self promotion. self promotion-or promoting or promoter how ever you want to word it,it's all the same.have you ever had a friend that talk about hooking you up on a blind date with his sister friend mary,your friend talk and talk about mary so now that you heard so much about mary you can't wait to meet her,in this scenario who do you think the self promoter is #1.your friend...#2.mary...#3.The sister..I will let you think about that one.I remember doing a children birthday party when I was in high school,I made a body for sammy to urinate on the audience,sammy would drop his pants and start squirting,of course it's not real urine,it's water.The adults would run from sammy as I carry him squirting at the birthday child parents,this gimmick lead to repeat bookings and referrals,and it was remembrance of laughter for the birthday child,just seeing your parents running from a pissing doll is hilarious.in self promotion,the question is what are you willing to do or say to get your product noticed,remember you are the product as a ventriloquist,or even not a ventriloquist.if the news reporters are at a live event stand in the background wearing a T-shirt with your business phone number on it,even at all these protest that are going on,go hold up a sign that has your business phone number on it.self promoting is selfish and it's the greed of advertising,I will shove this product down your throat one way or another is goal of self promotion.back in the day a person would try ways to meet a famous singer to hand them a demo of music not knowing it doesn't work that way,the famous singer has agents and managers.famous people don't need self promotion and if they do,then they need a new agent.ok back to the scenario of your sister friend mary,who is the self promoter #1. #2. #3. The answer is #3.
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(THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY IN SAN DIEGO CALIFORNIA)
"don't rip my panties"....she says pointing a big 44.

there came a beautiful summer day IN my late teens my lil homie Rome park in front of my house blasting my favorite song so I run out side to greet him,as I sit in the chocolate factory passenger seat, my lil homie Rome says to me the chocolate factory is ready to go into production,during this time the royal kingdom presents production company and the chocolate factory were business partners,my business and my lil homie Rome business join together as one....as I sit in the passenger seat my lil homie Rome talking about he has been working on a deal for a month but he needs the royal kingdom presents production company to match him, twenty five plus twenty five,also he need front money,front money is a numbers game,what is front money,it's just numbers on paper, something like insurance or a status symbol or back in the day you and the person would go to the ATM to show the funds on screen or receipt.  My lil homie Rome said the returns would be twelve in seven days,returns is profit..The royal kingdom presents production company accept the chocolate factory deal because most of the deals were great returns or profits...The plan was to enter SAN Diego California Friday morning and return back down to los angeles California on Sunday night, we will take protection only one each *lethal* and only if l give my lil homie Rome the look twice was for the protection to be used,only I will have I.d. and only business funds will be taken with us, my lil homie Rome will drive the chocolate factory and we leave los Angeles and come back together no matter what...my lil homie Rome girlfriend was the middle man in San Diego California,she said her client said the chocolate factory was too small of a business,so that's why the chocolate factory almost begging my company to merged in with San Diego California.
The weekend of San Diego came,Friday we rented a motel room with two beds inside for the weekend, not to bore you with details of the story,the business in San Diego California went smoothly, we went sight seeing, the beaches, the zoo,the plan was Sunday would be strictly business and get out...but at the beginning of the story "don't rip my panties" here it is...
Saturday me and my lil homie Rome relaxing in the motel with the chocolate factory parked in front outside of the motel room door, the chocolate factory alarm go off,I go out look around,my lil homie Rome stays in the motel room,I go back inside the motel room,I said it must have been the wind, alarm go off again so me and lil homie Rome go sit in side the chocolate factory for a while but nothing was going on,we walk back inside the room and there's a knock at the front door two female voices laughing "room service" my lil homie Rome open door "aw Vann it's them" walking in my lil homie Rome so call girlfriend with a five feet tall woman with naturally red hair,a tear drop tattoo speaking with an accent, her hand out to shake mine,nicely polished finger nails with dollar charms, very rough accent saying "I was told so much about you I just couldn't wait to see you".....The girls wanted to play before business,we were from los Angeles visiting san Diego California,so they party with us..so you ask about the panties?..my lil homie Rome is laying in his own bed with his so call girlfriend that lived in San Diego California and I was in my own bed with I can not remember her name so I will call her TINY because she was, so we all drinking ghetto juice,listen to music, watching cable television, me and TINY are kissing laying in bed,TINY reach in her handbag to get her 44 she tells me to take her panties off,my lil homie Rome and his girlfriend are laughing..don't rip my panties she says to me as I am careful taking her panties off,my lil homie Rome is laughing while saying "the 44 is bigger than her!" We are "S"FACE!! from that ghetto juice we were drinking..I get her panties off,with out ripping them,TINY says to me "eat my panties" then my lil homie Rome and his so call girlfriend start chanting "eat her panties!" "eat her panties"
I start chewing her panties and her panties begins to become like cotton candy, tiny says to me "what do my panties taste like?"..I said "cherry" she said "yes they do,come here"... The panties are called edible panties,you can buy them at adult stores...
on Sunday it was strictly business, all four of us had breakfast at a restaurant together afterwards and departed on our happy way...you wonder why I say my lil homie Rome so call girlfriend, it's because he was only using her to meet her sister friend "TINY" you must understand my lil homie Rome looked like the lead singer of the band name *ready for the world* and he also had a deeper voice than mine so the girls were zombies for him, his so call girlfriend would communicate with TINY for my lil homie Rome...about the deal the returns were excellent and on schedule,after leaving San Diego California TINY wanted us to visit again but I would ask my lil homie Rome when we were going back to visit his so call girlfriend and TINY he would always say "so how about those lakers?"
I have no negative things to say about that deal in San Diego California and I know for sure my lil homie Rome had a positive experience,and his so call girlfriend was so head over heels for him, but he just shut the production down,who does that! his so call girlfriend would call call he never answered,directly to voice mail,he would listen to her voice mails,and sometimes let other people listen also..what were the so called girlfriend voice mails like,just imagine someone promised you the moon, the stars and one day they just just just, well, never existed...
I have good memories of the weekend of San Diego California.
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#vanndukeandsammyautobiography #vanndukeandsammy

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